Guest Post: Why Your Life May Need To Fall Apart by Norma Mzizi

Light in Darkness
Photo Cred: From Up North Online

 

Becoming ‘Norma Natural‘ has been a difficult, lonely yet fulfilling process. I was exhausted one Sabbath evening and as I lay on my bed I tried to figure out what it was that had me so tired on a day I should be feeling rejuvenated. Didn’t the answer come pouring like an open tap…..I was busy – busy doing so much for everyone else around me.

 

I was coming from a toxic, abusive and stagnant relationship. In trying to find myself again I got lost in religion, not in Christ. I wanted to be the perfect friend, sister and maybe wife. I made sure I looked right and sounded right, tried to be politically correct, and held on! I healed from the abuse but opened up for serious corrosion spiritually.

 

I spent days perfecting a company that was not mine, feeling drained and unappreciated. Embraced so called friends who took my time, my clothes and even my sanity at times. Thank God I learnt just in time….

 

Come Fridays, I’d be preparing Sabbath lunch and working on whatever program I needed to present or planning this and that. Don’t get me wrong, my heart and mind where in it all, but I did not realise I was giving and not feeding myself in the process. I was not just seeing to everyone’s needs, I was giving them me. Giving them parts of myself that I could not carry on without. Like an oak tree my shade was large enough for everyone, but my roots were weak, tired, dying!

 

You have to die a few times
Photo Cred: Buzznick Online

 

Who are you Norma? Are you this friend that everyone is crying to? Are you “Mrs Girlfriend” but not wife? Are you a pillar without a foundation? What are you doing at church besides serving and keeping to rules and regulations? Who are you behind those perfect outfits and flawless makeup? Do you even like eating what you are told is right to eat? Guuuurl! Who art thou?

 

Unfortunately (or rather fortunately) it took a shattered, empty feeling to get me back on track. My life came to a screeching halt. Down and disappointed, alone and weak – my awakening began.  Now God could have His turn. Now I was ready for His will, His purpose, His blue print for me. No rules no religion, it was time to seek my true self and feed her right so I could genuinely be right to the next person.

 

I stopped doing church. Yes, doing. Because I was doing it and not growing in Christ. I was perfect to a standard that someone else set. A diet that someone else prescribed, a belief system that was do or die. For a few more weeks I held on, trying to figure out if I was losing my sanity or actually finding it.

 

God never allows pain
Photo Cred: Daily Scrolls Online

 

Eventually I cut my relaxed hair (a girl is about to change her life when she cuts her hair, come on somebody!). I remember the liberating feeling of standing in the shower with no fear of messing up a “hair do”. By the time I started putting on make-up I became rebellious. I had that “why should I?” moment. Anyway who says I’m not ravishing, drop dead gorgeous without it? This stuff stings and burns my eyes anyway! So much work and for what?! At that moment I realised I could go natural in every sense of the word.

 

I started researching on ways to get back to basics. I wanted to be true to me as an earth child and the spirit within. To listen to the reason why I loved walking bare feet on grass and listening to the sound of water; to feed that spirit that was so in touch with her nature but had strayed to foreign “truths”. Long story short, I found shea butter, coconut oil and black soap. Those were my first back to Eden cosmetics. Didn’t my skin and hair flourish!

 

I became so radical in my return to nature so much so that people asked me what I was on. I ate what I figured worked well with my blood type (Yes, I’m a meat eater y’all)! I devoured that fish and meat and got my sexy back either way. I learnt to listen to that inner voice, to listen to my body, to hear my inner being.

 

All the while many things were falling off: The need to impress was dying. I did what I could when I could. I even stopped going on unnecessary dates, where I knew these men were only interested in me making them look good. It was all but physical attraction.

 

They could not stomach that I was a single mother of two. I wasn’t good enough to take to Mum and Dad who expected him to bring home a virgin. What is sad is that these “godly” men are out here sleeping with us but they want to marry a virgin. Dating and relationships is a whole book on its own. Let me leave it right here.

God never uses anyone greatly until
Photo Cred: Lil Blue Boo Online

 

As I was saying, people became inquisitive of the new look and confident force driving me. I have a deep sense of connection now. I know who God says I am. I know I am a spirit having a human experience in a body of clay; this zulu girl, intombi yakoMzizi  umaJama kaZulu uMpinda kaVezi isalukazi esimabelebele esancelisa ingane ngaphesheya kolwandle! Umuzi ubiywa ngenhloko zamadoda, uzulu kalidumi libonakala ngezikhukhula zomfula, umphankomo enebele,  Jama kaNdaba, KaPhunga, kaMageba, kaNkosinkulu, kaZulu, kaNtombela, kaMalandela, kaLusulumane, kaGumede, kaMnguni waseMbo! Lilizela bo!!!

 

I started sharing my secret and giving products to people. When I realised I was getting a following I started selling the products and different remedies that I found. At times other people would bring their own things and ask me to blend them as they wanted that “Norma’s Touch” thing hence the birth of Norma’s touch organic treatments & lifestyle products! My motto today is “If you cannot eat it, then it should not be on your hair and skin.”

Your pain often reveals God's purpose
Photo Cred: i.pinimg.com

It took my hitting absolute rock bottom for God to get my attention and grow me into my purpose for being on this earth. We tend to feel as though God has forsaken us when we are faced with our darkest moments, and we forget that He creates best out of void and darkness (Genesis 1:2). If you’re going through a season of darkness, pain and uncertainty draw nearer to God. He is trying to birth something new in you.

Love and light,

Norma Mzizi

Norma

Norma is a young woman who is passionate about people living a natural and healthy lifestyle as God intended. She is full of humour and great compassion for her fellow man, and seeks to live authentically. You can find Norma and her amazing natural products on Facebook and Instagram.

 


 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed and as if everything in your life is literally falling apart, it is most probably because God is seeking to transform your life for the better. He is seeking to expose the gold within you so that you can live for Him and be a blessing to those around you. Don’t give up sis.

With love,

Sonia Dee

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Guest Post: The Most Harmful Ingredients in Shampoo for Naturals by Patrina

Harmful Shampoos
Photo Cred: Coisas De Diva

 

If you’re looking at the most harmful ingredients in shampoo, you should know that not all the ingredients on this list are detrimental to all people. Our natural hair requires different ingredients than the products available on the beauty supply shelf.

As we gain more knowledge about natural hair, we come to realize that many of the mainstream shampoos that millions of people use every day simply don’t work for us naturals.

In this post, you’ll find the most harmful ingredients in shampoos, specifically geared toward anyone who wants to maintain their beautiful curls.

 

Sulfates

 

Sulfates
Photo Cred: Waxine

The culprits are: Sodium Laureth Sulfate, Sodium Lauryl Sulfate, or Ammonium Laureth Sulfate. It’s heavily debated whether these ingredients are harmful to the body, but one thing is for sure: Sulfates strip natural hair of its moisture and luster, leaving it dry, brittle, and tangled.

Always choose shampoos that do not contain sulfates if you have natural hair. A product like Shea Moisture Coconut Hibiscus Curling Shampoo is an excellent choice because it doesn’t contain chemicals, and has ingredients that nourish kinky hair.

 

Mineral Oil and Other Petroleum-based Products

 

Greasy Products
Photo Cred: Derby City Naturals

Mineral Oil and other petroleum-based ingredients are tempting because they add a lot of shine. But what happens is that they coat the hair strand with oil that is impossible to penetrate. When you can’t get anything through to the hair shaft—including water—you’ll be left with dry hair underneath.

The only way to remove petroleum-based products is by using a harsh shampoo, usually one containing sulfates. Try shea butter instead. It will coat the strand, and leave your hair nourished instead of dry.

 

Fragrance

 

bottles of health and beauty products on white background
Photo Cred: Astroglide Online

Beauty companies are constantly trying to make their products smell good to consumers, but the way they’re doing it is sneaky. One innocent fragrance listing could contain anywhere from 1-100 chemicals within it.

Fragrance contains phthalates, which are esters of phthalic acid. Phthalates are linked to endocrine disruption, developmental and reproductive toxicity, and cancer, according to the Campaign for Safe Cosmetics.

To avoid fragrance, choose products that have essential oils listed for aroma. These will be far more beneficial to your hair and scalp, and they won’t be toxic.

 

Polyethylene Glycol (PEG)

 

Polyethylene Glycol
Photo Cred: Avacare Medical Online

This chemical serves to dissolve oil and grease and works as a thickening agent in shampoo. Stripping the scalp of its natural oils is never a good idea because it lowers the immune system and leaves the skin vulnerable to fungal and bacterial infections.

Natural hair thrives on moisture, so cleansing oils away from the hair can lead to dryness and breakage. Apple Cider Vinegar makes a gentler rinsing agent and will help remove product buildup without removing natural oils.

 

Silicones

 

Silicones
Photo Cred: Reef Cosmetics Online

Silicones usually come with the names Dimethicone, Cyclomethicone, Amodimethicone, or any other word with a “cone” in it. Silicones are good in theory because they soften hair, smooth down cuticles, and give hair the illusion of being shinier.

The problem is, they will prevent moisture from your sebum from penetrating the hair shaft, eventually leaving your hair dull and lifeless. Silicones may even lead to breakage. The only way to remove the ‘cones’ is by using a harsh sulfate shampoo. Combining sulfates and silicones will likely lead to further damage.

 

An easy way to avoid buying toxic, chemical-laden products is to scan the first five ingredients on the label. Are they all names you can pronounce? If not, place it back on the shelf. What’s the point in buying chemicals for your hair? Many beauty products are expensive, so you should get one that has the most helpful ingredients possible.

Kinky hair thrives on moisture. You might consider limiting the use of shampoo, and opting to do mostly co-washes.

If you’re in an area where you don’t have access to great natural hair products, try to find the ingredients and make DIY products in your kitchen instead.

Now it’s your turn to discuss. Have you found toxic ingredients in your regular shampoo? Which products and natural ingredients do you use instead?

 

Patrina Pic

Patrina is the founder of Naturalhairqueen.net; a blog to educate and inspire women with natural hair. Patrina just celebrated her 10-year natural hair anniversary, and achieved her goal of waist length hair. With the knowledge she has learned over the years she is dedicated to share her knowledge, and experience to educate women who wish to have moisturized, healthy natural long hair.

You can connect with Patrina on these social media platforms:

Website: www.Naturalhairqueen.net

Facebook: www.facebook.com/naturalhairqueensite/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/NatHairQueen

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nathairqueen/


 

Thank you Patrina for sharing your wisdom on how to best care for our natural hair.

Take care ladies, till next time!

With love,

Sonia Dee

Guest Post: Release Your Hold On The Old And Grab Onto The New by Precious Muza

Old vs new
Photo Cred: Subtilitas Online

 

Ever wanted to move on from past failures and mistakes but you find yourself going back to consume that same vomit?

Ever feel like the past is simply weighing you down and you have no more fight left in you?

Ever feel like you aren’t sure about which road to take because the road you’ve been on has been super taxing?

Well then…this one’s for you!

In the song The Healing Grace, the bridge goes “…release us from our past as we seek Your face. Wash us free at last, we receive Your love. We receive Your healing grace…”. These few statements are packed with the promise for a better day, a promise for a better future!

God’s GRACE heals.

It heals even that which you feel is beyond redemption. I have a good group of young prayerful women who I have the privilege of calling friends and as I have conversed with them over the years… I realise that humans generally carry a lot of baggage. Sadly though, sometimes that baggage is a hindrance from moving on.

In some cases, the baggage from the old relationship is brought into the new one, before the new one develops. The inevitable self-destruction creeps up because the load from the past makes the new relationship a daunting task.

RELEASE YOUR BAGGAGE SIS, YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS!

One of my favourite verses illuminates the importance of letting go of the past. Isaiah 43:18-19 reads “Do not dwell on things of the past for I am making something new, Do you not perceive it? I make a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.”

If your past seems like a wasteland, don’t freeze and become restless. Let it go and move past it. Not as easy as it sounds right? I am still working through my own STUFF but His grace is sufficient for me and it’s certainly sufficient for you too.

I would suggest three ways of letting go of your past and holding fast your new blessing:-

  1. SAY GOODBYE TO THE PAST

People who have been disappointed or have experienced grief/loss need to take the time to grieve in order to open a new page with a fresh perspective. To say there is a time frame here would not be ideal, some people heal after a few days but some may take years. The healing process is necessary. Allowing yourself to feel the pain is essential because it makes you realise that you were never in control. God is the ultimate ruler and pilot of your life so learn to trust Him even with your disappointments.

 

  1. BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE WORTH IT

The iconic L’Oreal phrase, “Because you’re worth it”, is profound and should be applied in our lives. Do I believe I’m worth it? YES! Do I always believe that I am? NO! Should you believe you are worth it? YES! Do you always believe you are worth it? PERHAPS! The point is… I am worth it and so are you. Not momentarily but always. God has proved to me time and again that He reserves what is best for me and He does the same for each and every one of us who are called according to His purpose. Believe that if God can do it for someone you know, He can do it for you. If He doesn’t, maybe the time isn’t right but it’s never because you aren’t worth it. When your blessing comes, it will be so big your joy will not be contained. Believe it. The future belongs to those who believe.

 

  1. EXPECT GOOD THINGS

Pessimism has stolen our dreams and then SOME! A negative mind set does not reflect faith, belief or a spirit of perseverance. A pessimist would much rather give up and expect all doom and gloom. The word tells us in Phillipians 4 vs 8 that we should dwell on whatever is good, noble and excellent. Anything worthy of praise is what we ought to think of and the flood gates of heaven’s blessings will come tumbling down.  Expect that God is doing something BIG and watch Him work. You need not fight, you need not be anxious.

 

When you let go of a painful past, you essentially throw caution to the wind and you say “Hey I will go for the gold and I won’t worry about the outcome”.

Nothing inhibits you because you know the Lord will fight your battles for you! YOU NEED ONLY TO BE STILL – Exodus 14:14.

In Phillipians 3:13-14, Paul writes “Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. I press on towards the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus”.

Previously known as Saul, Paul does not let his past mistakes deter him from pressing towards his goal. Let’s wear those blinkers and look ahead! We have the perfect example in Paul.

Sisters in Christ, many of us profess to love the Lord but we do not fully allow Him to work in us and through us. Reading scripture is all fine and dandy but putting into practice what God says we should do and trusting in what He has promised is where the rubber meets the road. This is when your faith is put to the test. So let go, pursue the ladder of progress, step by step.  Allow yourself to stretch, release the pain and raise yourself up, one step at a time, Jesus promises, you trust, He leads and you follow.

 

PRAY TODAY

I PRAY LORD THAT YOU MAY HELP ME TODAY TO LET GO OF THE PAST AND TO TRUST YOUR PERFECT PLAN FOR MY LIFE.

 

Precious Guest Post 2

Precious Muza is a beautiful young woman with an equally beautiful heart. She is kind, compassionate and driven with a great love for the Lord and doing His will in her life. Precious has an amazing blogsite called Gleam of Dawn which aims at sharing experiences in the Christian walk, in a world that has become driven by the external.

Precious is a wife, daughter, sister and friend. She is an academic and a brilliant writer. I look forward to seeing all that God desires to fulfill through this wonderful young woman 🙂